Global Mission

Global Mission
A Heart for His People

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Its Go Time!




It has been almost 3 months since my last update.  Life has been busy in these last three months.  Many of you have seen that I had a few really fun "cancer" experiences.  I had the privilege to do a Living Proof commercial for Allegheny Health Network as well as to grace the cover of Pittsburgh's magazine, Whirl, for the month of October with my surgical oncologist! Opportunities to share my journey are very healing and I jump at the opportunity!








Within these last three months post treatment I have had to deal with many ailments from severe constipation, to the longest case of Bronchitis known to man, to folliculitis, to just feeling plain crappy.  All of these ailments just play with your post treatment mind.  It has really been a battle to not let your thoughts go down the road of.."Is this cancer?"  I am also taking a long term drug called Tamoxifen that can also present some of those side effects.  Its so not fun!


I am mostly doing well but am still going through lots of healing especially emotionally.  The Lord has been so good to me through all of this and the one reminder that He continues to give to me are the words  from one song... "He knows my name, He knows my every thought, He see's each tear that falls, and He hears me when I call."   Yes, Yes, Yes! I feel blessed and generally joyful, but their are things that cause me tears. I have thoughts and feelings that I have to wrestle with and it is a battle.  I hold tight to the truths and know them in my heart so that when my feelings are all over the map I can hold on to what I know is true.   What blesses me most is the love of others.  I have had a really tough last few weeks and every person who texted me or saw me or even sent me letters in the mail and just thoughtfully asked how I was doing or said they were praying for me or offered a hand of love towards me...you have no idea how much that blessed me.  I have cried at each and every gesture because they came at such a timely moment.

I had my post initial surgery MRI last week.  I didn't expect to feel anxious about it, but as the days went by of not hearing anything it became harder and harder. Thankfully I got word yesterday that everything came back clean! No signs of cancer! Praise God!   We all breathed a sigh of relief!

Tomorrow I will embark on my next phase in reconstruction. I will be having surgery. I am getting nipples reconstructed..crazy right? I debated on the need for that but feel that the more normal I can get myself back to being the less reminders I will have to face on a daily basis. I will also be getting fat grafting, which is basically liposuction to get fat out of one area to be used in another area.  I have a few places on my chest that need some plumping up. I also have what they call a dog ear on my abdominal incision. This is a pointy spot that resembles a dog ear at the end of my incision.
that pointy end is my dog ear..and yes that line across my stomach is my entire incision from my DIEP flap reconstruction
Its not very cute so we are getting rid of that.  I may also get my port out! So lots going on but I have no idea what to expect as far as recovery goes. It kinda feels like I'm starting over again but as long as the pain is under control, I am honestly looking forward to the forced time to rest. I need it!

Well friends, this update is the real honest update because I believe in being transparent. We are all not exempt from life's trials but how we handle them makes all the difference.  I cannot do it alone, nor can you! Thank you for your love and support!

Some are asking what my needs are..I don't expect anything but find it helpful to put things out there so I can direct those who are asking..

I have a meal train set up for the next three weeks if you would like to sign up for a meal.  There are only a few spots left..https://www.mealtrain.com/trains/md91g6
                   
Financial support  https://www.youcaring.com/barnabas-and-amanda-agwuocha-602767


The Bell!!!! I got to ring this Bell!!!!

Thank you!!!




With lots and lots of love,

Amanda

Wednesday, August 16, 2017

We Made It!

Yesterday I wasn't sure if this was all going to happen.  I wrote this post before getting the dreaded call that my treatment had been denied by my insurance.  This morning I got the call that I had been praying and hoping for that others had virtually thought would be impossible...but I got approved!

They said, "Your prayers worked."


Well friends, it has been some time since I have shared with you.  I have basically been living life as normal as possible with a brief interruption once every three weeks. In those three weeks I have been going in for Herceptin infusions. I have had a total of 16 of these infusions. Guess what?  1 more to go!!!! The reason I come to share with you is that today I drove to get my lab work done for the last time for treatment.  Tomorrow 8/16/2017 will be my last and final infusion of Herceptin which should finish my active cancer treatment. This whole journey has been one that when I look back on I can barely keep it together.  Even I, can't believe that I just went through everything I have had to go through this year.  When I flash back at pictures and memories my heart takes a deep dive.  So many thoughts and so many emotions, but one thing I am thankful for on the daily is that I am still here, I am still able to be the wife I desire to be and the mother that I am blessed to be.


Who knew having cancer would provide opportunities that I could only dream of...  These past few weeks I have had the honor of doing a few tv related projects revolving around breast cancer.  Along the way I have met some beautiful people who also are walking the same journey as myself.  I had the opportunity to speak on behalf of Glimmer of Hope for Stand Up To Cancer night at PNC park.  I also had the opportunity to do a little tv shoot for Highmark, Allegheny Health Network just basically sharing my story and showcasing how they care for women.  It was a fun opportunity amidst all of this not so fun stuff I've had to go through.


I have been reflecting on my last infusion day and what that will look like.  I knew I would want my family to be there to celebrate but other than that I wasn't so sure.  I then was inspired by another survivor who graciously donated a bell to Magee Womens Hospital and decided that my Cancer Institute needed to have a bell.  I proceeded to have one made, engraved with the popular chemo bell peom...



I never would have imagined that it would have been a struggle to get my center to approve the hanging of this bell, but with lots of prayer and people who believe in me and in celebrating life, we were able to get through the red tape of medical facility politics and get that bell hung up!  They did kind of tuck it away in a more secluded spot but nonetheless it is up! Sooooo tomorrow, 8/16/2017, I will have the honor of being the first to ring the bell and to close the chapter on Chemotherapy. WooooHooooo!
Can you see the bell?

So what is left to be done? On August 30th I will meet again with my plastic surgeon.  There we will schedule and plan for phase 2 of my reconstruction. With my DIEP flap I had immediate reconstruction where my extra fat from my stomach was used to fill in to my new breasts.  I do not have nipples, but the doctors and make me some. So phase 2 will include those.  It will also hopefully include fixing my stomach up a little bit because currently its a little lopsided. My hematoma caused my stomach to bulge on the right side and now is larger on that side than the other.  I also have a final scan to be done to confirm that I am cancer free.  I can't wait for that! Then after that I will hopefully get my port out which is also a minor surgery.  My goal is to get this all done this year so that I can minimize my medical bills next year!!!! Each year cost me at least $7,000 of which I still owe for this year. Painful right?!?!!!!

I am so incredibly thankful for so many of you.  You have gotten me through this year.  You have touched my heart and my family.  You will forever be engraved into my heart for being there for me in my hardest times. God gave me a verse in the beginning of all of this..Exodus 14:14...The Lord will fight for you, you have only to be still.  That verse has carried me through and has taught me so much about true trust and faith in the One who can do it better than me.  He has used all of you to do so much of the fighting so that I could be still.  That stillness allowed me to focus my time and energy on my health and my family. You are all superhero's in my book!

Check back for footage of my final treatment and the RINGING OF THE BELL!  I can't wait!

 All my love,
Amanda

Sunday, May 14, 2017

From my Heart to Yours, Happy Mother's Day!




Today we celebrate motherhood.  This is a day that comes with many feelings.  The usual around here is breakfast in bed, flowers, relaxation (for me), multiple homemade mothers day cards, a hustling husband who is scurrying around to pull together a special meal for the moms of the family, and lots and lots of love.
Blueberry Waffles in Bed
made by my loving husband!

 I am also not without awareness of all of the ladies out there who have experienced hardships that may leave this day with disappointments and an ache in their heart.  I see you too!  I have experienced some of those disappointments myself throughout the course of my last 11 years of motherhood. As many of you know, this past year I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  The very first thought that raced through my mind was the very important role that I play..being a mother.  My children's faces flashed before my eyes and I just couldn't imagine putting them through such a hardship.  I couldn't imagine not being there for them.  I wanted to be their mom more than ever!

Last July at the cottage.  I
knew something was wrong
and suspected cancer but I had no idea.
I look happy but my heart
 was so heavy in this picture.
I needed to take as many
pictures as possible with
my kids.  The future was unknown.

I had the opportunity to get away this weekend with my mom and sister in law. My mom has a cottage in Pymatuning where we like to go.  Last July we were away at that cottage when I first discovered my lump.  I had not returned back to the cottage until this past weekend.  I didn't really think about it much until the second day being up there and I went to use the bathroom.  Something about the mirror in that bathroom causes me to pause for a moment and look into it.  I don't really do that at home because my mirrors are smaller.  I had that flashback moment this time that took me back to last July. I then had a moment where I just wanted to thank that mirror for being there.  For being big enough to cause me to pause for a moment to see myself.  I thank God for that moment and for that mirror!! I remember spending the rest of my time that July week holding all of the fears of the world inside. Putting on a brave face for those around me and capturing as much quality time as possible with my precious ones.
Lifesaver!





This past week I was also able to attend my daughters Spring concert.  While watching my daughter sing her heart out I teared up remembering that just in December I was coming out of a long 13 hour surgery which kept me from being able to attend her Christmas concert.  This time I was front and center, taking pictures and videos and proudly waving to my girl!
Way to sing your heart out Mar Mar!




Last night Glimmer of Hope, a nonprofit organization supporting women with breast cancer, held an event with Chick Fil A and 100.7, called Hero Night.  It was an amazing event at the Children's Museum where Moms were celebrated as being Heroes!  We had a truly memorable evening being all together. They pampered us and fed us and brought out the boogie in us!  Thank you Diana Napper for being who you are and passing on that Glimmer of Hope to so many women!



















To my family and to anyone who this may speak to.. this is the cry of my heart ~

"God, I want to say thank you.  I want to thank you for my husband, I want to thank you for my children, I want to thank you for the responsibility you have given to me.  Thank you for my parents who show me great love.  Thank you God for this Mothers day.  Thank you for my life.  I will not take it for granted and will continue to thank you for having Grace upon me.  God I lift up those who may be suffering on this day. Those who wish to be a mom, lost a mom, lost a child, are separated from their loved ones, those who are single parenting and don't get that break, everyone...I pray that they would feel your GRACE today!"


Happy Mothers Day, from my heart to yours!


~Amanda Grace
My Mothers Day Gift of Flowers

Monday, March 6, 2017

You Win Some, You Lose Some!


Last Wednesday, March 1, 2017, I went into the Wexford Health and Wellness Pavilion Cancer Center to receive my third of 11 Herceptin treatments. Before going in for my infusion I always go and get my labs drawn to check for any elevated blood counts. I have been dealing with elevated liver enzymes for the last few months.  I've been working on cleansing my liver, but its been a little nerve wracking.  This time around two of the three levels were in normal range while my Alkaline Phosphatase was still a little elevated.  The doctors at this time do not seem to be concerned but are watching it.  I so badly just want everything to fall into the "normal" range.



On the plus side though, my wonderful oncologist came to talk with me and said to me...No Radiation!   Oh my word, I couldn't even believe that I actually heard those words and that that was FINAL!   The doctors have been going back and forth on my case for months!  They settled on me needing radiation back in November. I went in for my surgery in December, got my pathology results, and then met with my radiation oncologist in the beginning of February. When the doctor came into the room, he just shook his head and said that he wasn't convinced that I really needed radiation. He went over every scan and test and pathology result with me and said I didn't really fit into the category of radiation based on all of my results. To be sure he was going to present my case before other radiation oncologists to confirm what he was thinking. I waited a whole month before finding out and was really hoping that I wouldn't need it, but was also prayerful that if I did need it, that the doctors would make that decision.  The final result was confirmed that since I did not have any positive lymph nodes or mammary nodes and since my original Pet Scan did not identify the one question mark Intramammary node, and since the rest of my cancer had melted away from the chemo, that this in fact was a prominent node and not cancerous.

The circled "After Chemo" nodes remained unchanged after chemo.
After my Double Mastectomy the Intramammary node was biopsied and came back negative for cancer.
The question was regarding the internal node that was behind my chest wall and could not be biopsied. It remained unchanged and did not light up in my Pet Scan to be cancerous. This little guy was the big question mark. We feel confident that it is noncancerous.


While I had 3 seconds to be excited about the no radiation, I was quickly brought back to reality of this serious fight that I am in.  The next punch! Boom!  So my doctor then began to explain the next step in the process.  She said that since my breast cancer was hormone driven I was going to need to continue Hormone suppressant drugs for the next 10 years. BAM!  Here were my options.. I was given the choice to take Tamoxifen, which has all sorts of side effects such as fatigue, hot flashes, nausea, brain fog, weight gain, possible ovarian cysts that could lead to ovarian cancer if not watched, depression and the list goes on and on... or I could put myself into menopause through a Lupron Shot and then take a drug called Arimidex.  Arimidex can also have some of those lovely side effects but can also cause osteoporosis.  The reason for these drugs is that my body has cells that estrogen would normally attach itself to.  These drugs hook onto the cells and block the estrogen from being able to attach itself to my cells.  This then gives me a greater chance of not having a recurrence. I have now spent the whole weekend talking to my doctors, friends, cancer survivors, family, my husband and doing Internet research to try and decide which option is the best for me.  I thought that once I finished Herceptin in August that I would be on my merry little way off of this cancer train and back to my normal life, but I have since been reminded that this process is forever ongoing and isn't always going to be easy.  For now, through my research, I have decided to to take the Tamoxifen.  I have read that their are many different manufacturers of this drug and one of the manufacturers seems to be more tolerable than the others based on the fillers that are used in the pill.  I specially ordered this brand and will start tomorrow.  I am hoping and praying that I am very minimally impacted by the side effects.
I have decided to take the Tamoxifen but have researched that the Mylan brand is less tolerable so I have switched to the MaynePharma/Teva formula that has been said to have much less side effects.  We'll see :)


So for now that is where things are at in my life.  I am recovering and I have so so much to be thankful for, but the fight is not over.  Their is no "EASY" part. Even if it appears easy from an outside perspective, it is inwardly still a fight.   Thank you for your prayers and support and meals.  It means the world to our family!

Love,
Amanda

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Was There any Cancer Left? Pathology Results

My supportive husband working through my treatment


The big question after all of the treatment and surgeries that I have been through is... was there any cancer left?  Were my lymph nodes positive for breast cancer?  How about my inner and intra mammary nodes? You know those big white spots that never changed in size throughout treatment.

Well I got some answers and still have some question marks.

My wonderful surgeon Dr. Duggal came in while I was still in the ICU and shared with me my results.  Basically speaking she told me that my invasive cancer was 100% gone. I did have one small noninvasive cancer that showed up in one of my milk ducts.  The intramammary node that was within my breast tissue was also negative, although it had not changed in size.  That meant that it was just a prominent node meaning larger but not cancerous. I also had a questionable abnormal internal mammary lymph node that was not removed and cannot be biopsied because it is behind my chest wall. All in all my surgeon was very very pleased with these results.  Basically I had a 99% response to the chemotherapy and of course by the grace of God. They were able to remove the one noninvasive duct that had a small amount of cancer in it.  That means I should not have any remaining cancer traveling throughout my body. My lymph nodes in my right arm came back negative as well! They did remove 4 axillary nodes to biopsy them, but they all came back negative praise God!!

The big question mark is that one internal mammary lymph node.  It has not changed in size, similar to the other node that was within my breast but turned out to be a prominent node. My radiation oncologist told me a few weeks back that he was not convinced that I would need radiation.  He wasn't convinced that that node was cancerous since everything else responded so well to the treatment that it wouldn't make any sense for these other nodes to not change in size at all.  So he is thinking it isn't cancerous.  To be sure though he was going to present my case to the board of oncologists that meet monthly.  My prayer is that they will have great wisdom regarding my case and will be 100% sure of what is best for me.  I am willing to accept either course and will trust that God will guide us to the right decision. 

Tomorrow March 1, 2017, I will be heading back to the Wexford Health and Wellness Pavilion to receive my 3rd of 11 treatments of Herceptin. I have to have my blood work drawn up before each treatment.  The last two times I have had elevated liver enzymes which should not be a side effect of Herceptin.  They will be keeping a very close eye on that. I have been trying really hard this last month to refrain from anything that would effect my liver. I am prayerful that my numbers are back to normal.  Herceptin is infused the same way as chemotherapy and was part of my chemo cocktail.  It is much easier on its own but does have some side effects.  I have noticed a few being sore joints and bone pain. I feel a little older these days :) . Tomorrow I will meet with my oncologist and will hopefully get the results of that conference with the board regarding my need for radiation.  


Herceptin round 1
Herceptin round 2















Will you join me in praying for my results.  I would like my blood work to return to normal levels and my liver enzymes to be down from three weeks ago.
My Liver Detox Smoothie!


Also join me in praying for the results of my need for radiation.  Pray that whatever answer they give me would be the right answer, would be His answer for me!


Although I am done with the intense chemotherapy, I am far from done with this fight.  The fight now is to keep the cancer away.  Please continue to keep me and my family in your prayers.  I am about a month out from my lifting restrictions to be lifted.  My body is still healing from my surgery.  I still have funny feelings in my arms and hands and am going through many changes in my body.  Please don't stop praying for me!  I need them!

Thank you for all of your love and support!  I will update after I get my results!

Love,
Amanda

I could use your help if you are looking for a way to be involved by my mealtrain.  We have some dates that are open if you are available. 
Click Here to sign up : https://www.mealtrain.com/trains/md91g6



Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Part 2 : Post Surgery and Leading up to Christmas

Continuing from the last post about my surgery, I will fill you in on some further details about my week in the hospital post surgery.



So, the expected recovery time after a double mastectomy with immediate DIEP Flap reconstruction is anywhere from 3-7 days.  I was in the hospital following this surgery for 6 days.  During those six days I spent 5 of them in the ICU.  Two of those days are expected but the remaining 3 days came with some complications.  For the first 48 hours the nurses were monitoring my heart rate, temperature, blood pressure, blood flow in my reconstructed breasts, and monitoring my drains.  I had 4 drains. One for each breast and one for each side of my lower abdomen. On day 2 my right drain started to drain a lot of extra blood. I was running a low grade fever, and my heart rate was "tacky" other known as elevated.  It then came to my doctors attention that I was probably forming a hematoma on my right side which was causing the excessive bleeding.  They put a tummy binder tightly around my waist to try and limit the bleeding. My temperature was a mystery.  My heart rate is what really got the ICU concerned.  I spent a lot of time just trying to stay calm and focused to bring the rate down. Every time a doctor would come in though, of course it would spike. That was really quite frustrating and a bit scary for me.  I could feel my heart beating and was just praying to God that it would not turn into a life threatening situation.  The doctors put me through all sorts of tests to rule out what it could be.  Thankfully the week before I had just had an echocardiogram.  I kept telling them that I had just had one so they could use that as their baseline.  The doctors then felt that the bleeding from the Hematoma  was causing my heart to overcompensate for the constant loss.



 They then started to infuse me with two sometimes three blood transfusions a day until my heart would stabilize. During this time although I was honestly a little concerned, I continued to keep my focus.  That focus was to make an impact on others.  I am a relational person and spent much of my time conversing with any person who entered my life in that hospital.  Sharing stories of life with my nurses and doctors and physical therapists and visitors were such a blessing!

My dad brought in cookies to bless the nurses with! 
 It was impressed upon my heart to reach out to my church and ask for prayer on my behalf.  A few wonderful people came and prayed for me and over me.  It's not just about the prayer that encouraged me, but the encounters with the people that they would take time out of their day to walk in freezing temperatures to show a tangible act of God's love over me was amazing! You know who you are and I thank you!

During this period of time in the ICU I also had to learn how to "walk" again. The first day I could only walk a few steps down the hallway and back.  Day two I did a complete lap.  I really didn't want to do it and was afraid I might pass out, but I was determined to prove that I was strong and capable. So I did.




On day 5 they transferred me to a regular room, where I shared a room with a lovely sweet elderly lady.  I really wasn't excited about sharing a room.  I could barely walk to the bathroom so I needed a potty close by and that was a little uncomfortable for me with not much privacy. Need a visual???




  I overcame those feelings and offered myself up to the fact that I was meant to meet this woman and that my life would impact hers and she would mine.  I will never forget her.

She was discharged the day after me.
We hugged and cried when I left.
She is a beautiful soul!


 There are many smaller stories to share within this larger story but I may bore you, so I will spare you alllllll of the details, but the gist of it is that this was definitely a challenge of a lifetime but wrapped up with so, so many blessings.

Thank you Capital One for sending flowers to my dad on my behalf, after he had told you what I was going through.  

Thank you Aunt Mary for sending me this wonderful Christmas arrangement. Made me feel very loved!

After 5 days in the ICU, I needed a little fun time!

I was discharged on the 6th day and for the first time in a week was able to hold my babies!  Ahh was that wonderful! Mommy was home and it was time for me to reassure my little ones that mommy was ok and that all of their emotions and fears and attempts to be strong and have courage could now melt away in my arms.




I spent the next week recovering, sleeping in a recliner, going to the bathroom in a portable potty in my living room and being cared for afterwards by my "in sickness and in health" amazing husband, being bathed by my mom and sweet sister in law, having nurses visit to aide in my recovery, and get ready for Christmas!
My first shower! Thanks mom and Pooh!


 I had a very emotional surprise visit by some amazing, amazing people who showed up to my doorstep one evening and started to Christmas carol for my family.  There were over 50 people there including WTAE news. As I sat there looking out onto the crowd, I wept.  I wept with gratitude.  My eyes gazed into the faces of each and every person and there I had a flashback with each face as I saw the moments throughout the course of this journey that, that person had been there for me through. I saw meals being dropped off, I saw visits while in chemotherapy, I saw the card that I read that came in the mail, I saw childcare, I saw little gifts that were given, I saw my new laundry room that was gifted to me on my second floor, I saw rides that you give to my children to school,  I saw people, my army, you who have been there for me!  Oh it was overwhelming and so perfect all at the same time.
An amazing dinner provided by Bistro To Go coincidentally the same evening!



We made the news that night!


By Christmas Eve I was becoming more mobile and able to at least shower myself.  We hosted Christmas Eve at our home as tradition.  My amazing family helped make this possible. Gifts were wrapped, kids were in their new Christmas pj's and Christmas day was around the corner.  I did turn a corner on Christmas day, and will save that for my next update!
Dessert Table on Christmas Eve all given by neighbors and loved ones!


Praying for Santa to come!

Christmas Eve at the Agwuocha's 


Love to all of you and thank you for sharing in my journey. Until next time!