The Power of Prayer When Battling

 #breastcancerawareness POST

I apologize that I have taken a break on sharing some of my story. Life has been really busy these last few weeks but my heart has been heavy as well knowing that so many are going through so many tough times that I cannot NOT continue to share.

First of all, to those of you who are battling cancer, effected by cancer, suffering from the loss of a loved one because of cancer (or really any other means of loss), caring for a loved one battling cancer and all of the in between, know that I am thinking of each of you. I lie awake at night with your stories on my heart and my mind. I use that time to pray for you. This journey is sooo hard and even when you may think that you have the easier road, that road somehow proves not to be so easy.

In my battle I knew within my heart that I needed just one person to be willing to pray over me. I believe in the touch of a loving God that even in the midst of our battles HE loves us. Not every situation turns out the way we hope for as well and for those battling or caring for one who is, we hold on to that dire HOPE that the chemo is working or that science will improve and that new treatment options will become available.

The one thing we are all looking for is more TIME.

When you find out you have cancer .. no matter the stage.. you go to the thought.. I am not ready to go. But then you wrap your mind around the fact that you have very little control over that.

I know for me I began literally preparing myself for the fact that I could very well lose this battle. Had I prepared my family? Did I train the girls on how to cook or set up things for the holidays? Could my husband carry on the traditions? Could they survive without me?

These were all very real thoughts I had.

I am well aware that when you are battling cancer, things can go in a lot of different directions and I had to come to terms with that.

I also came to terms with my conversation with God.

"Lord, please heal me!"

"Lord, use me and my story for you."

"Lord, if you choose to heal me eternally, I also accept that."

The initial shock of " You have cancer" hits and you go into a panic mode. I remember really thinking, I've run out of time.

Then you fight. You give it all you've got and you surrender the fight to HIM!

Then you wait. You wait for results.

Sometimes you get to breathe and other times you weep. You weep because the results are not what you hoped for.

After a good cry you pick yourself back up and you keep going.

This is the rollercoaster of this beast!

The one thing I knew for sure was that I needed a person willing enough to not just say, "I'm praying for you" but to actually come and pray over me. I was desperate for that.

I don't think the prayers have to come from someone who speaks loudly or acts all crazy lol. I think it honestly just takes someone who is willing.

With that said, if you are that person who needs someone willing.. Please reach out. I will gladly be that willing person. I will gladly pray with you or over you.

If you are reading this and you are near someone who might be going through this, also stand in the gap and offer yourself as a willing vessel to pray over someone.

You are not alone in this journey friends! Stay strong, keep the faith and pray!!

Feel free to also send me a message with any prayer requests.

I am here!

I love you!!

#prayer

#Cancer

#November6 #NationalGratitudeMonth #breastcancerawareness : Walking after My Diep Flap Surgery

 #November6

#NationalGratitudeMonth

#breastcancerawareness

*diagnosed in 2016. Sharing my breast cancer journey to spread awareness. Continuing my story well past October because I have so much more to share.

My last post took you through my elevated heart rate after my double mastectomy and my time in the ICU.

One of the key items that I had to do to graduate out of the ICU was to be able to stand up and walk again. This was quite a challenge because I was already very weak from my hematoma and my heart trying to replenish the blood loss with two back to back blood transfusions. It was also very challenging because with a Diep Flap surgery you have an incision in your lower abdomen that goes from one hip straight across to the other. The skin is very tight and has not yet had time to stretch. Standing up was one of those exercises that began the process to be able to stand up straight. My first walk in the hallway I could only make it down the hallway and then back to my room. I was extremely lightheaded. The second attempt I did much better and was able to make one full loop around the ICU. Here I will show you my first attempt. I look "good" here but I was just trying to be strong. I knew my limits and did my best. Yep that is me having to use a walker to walk. Talk about a humbling experience! Thanks mom for capturing this moment!

Since it is now November, the month of gratitude, I will say I am #thankful for my mom! She helped me so much in my recovery!

#postsurgery

#survivor

#breastcancer

#DIEPflap

There she goes. She's taking
her second walk, the first one

#day31 #BreastCancerAwarenessMonth #MyStory : Elevated Heart Rate Post Surgery

 #day31

#BreastCancerAwarenessMonth

*diagnosed in 2016. Resharing my story to spread awareness. All posts are also posted on my blog. https://agwuochafamily.blogspot.com/

I posted a few days ago asking if you would like me to continue sharing my story past the month of October. The response was in favor of me continuing the story. Thank you so much for following along. Thank you for sharing your words of encouragement and your words of inspiration to let me know that my story is making an impact in a multitude of ways.

This part of my story is particularly painful to share. It was the part of my story that I was totally unprepared for. It was the part of my story that stripped me of every ounce of normal that was left within me. I was weak and worn out and had very little left within me. I was scared yet brave all at the same time.

Through all of this, God remained ever so faithful and He brought me through.

In my last post I told you that after I woke up from surgery the nurses tried to help reposition me in my bed because I wanted to sit up a bit more. In doing this we caused something to happen within my abdomen where something pulled the wrong way and I began to internally bleed. You could tell because my drains started to fill massively with blood on my right side. At that time though the alarm bells had not quite gone off and we just assumed that this was completely normal drainage. The next event that occurred was that my heart rate started to become Tachycardic. That means that it was resting at an elevated heart rate. In the picture you see below if you zoom in you will see that my heart rate was resting at 140. That is not good. I did start to come down with a mild fever as well that could indicate an infection of some sort.

One of the nights, I believe on the second night, my dad and sister in law came to visit me. My dad brought me cookies and basically gave them to the nurses because I likely wasn't going to be eating much.

That evening was particularly scary because just the very effort of trying to talk to them caused my heartrate to go up. I remember my dad going to get the nurses out of concern. I believe it had gotten as high as 155 beats per min just by talking. My sister in law was trying to coach me to think happy thoughts to try and relax me. They ended up having to leave early so that I could lay in darkness and basically not stimulate my body in any way. I was scared. Why was my heart racing? Why was I bleeding so much? Why was I going through test after test with little answers?

Since I was bleeding a lot internally my hemoglobin was going down quite a bit. Due to this I was given several blood transfusions. After a transfusion my heartrate would begin to stabilize. When I say improving I mean like lowering to 115 vs 140+

At one point while in the ICU I was compelled to reach out to a few pastors from my church. I was prompted by the verse by James 5:14-15. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will restore the one who is sick. The Lord will raise him up.

I had reached a point in this recovery where I felt like I needed intervention. I needed a miracle. I needed the "church" to show up!

After me reaching out to someone, I had the lovely Blaine Workman and Donald Tucker showed up to my room in the ICU and they did just that. They prayed over me. I kid you not, my heart rate came down. I am so grateful for the care they poured out over me. When you are going through such a serious situation it is beneficial to know that you are not alone. Often you can feel isolated. I did my part to make my need known and they did their part by showing up! These are great reminders to "show up"! Let those going through trying times know that they are not alone.

We later learned that I had a hematoma. My heart could not keep up with the blood loss which was causing my heart rate to go up. My heart was being overworked to try and keep up with the loss of blood. This only took a few days to figure out. Essentially the hope was that it would eventually begin to clot and remedy itself. It sort of did but not without complication.

While laying here in the hospital bed, you can imagine that my hair was in for a wild ride. At this point every strand that I had worked so hard to save was now in one big massive knot in the back of my head lol. My dear mother came to the rescue and did her very best to set me straight. Thank you mom!!

More to come tomorrow!!

Thank you for reading as this truly is a very vulnerable part of my story. Love you!!

#survivor

#breastcancer

#surgery

#mystory

#doublemastectomy